On February 11, 2010, a noble patriarch died under ignoble circumstances. On September seventh, he was taken to the trauma center after a fall down a flight of stairs. The medical staff saved his life, stabilized his condition, and then, they killed him. The fall probably should have killed him, and that immediate death would have been more merciful in the long run. Instead, he remained a captive in a poorly funded, poorly staffed and poorly managed facility. His children tried to transfer him, but the institution prevented them from succeeding.
One moment, the doctors claimed he was almost ready for release; the next, he was returned to ICU because of an infection, or a breathing crisis, or a drop in his blood sugar that rendered him comatose. Just as it appeared that the transfer might become a reality, he developed sepsis and his kidneys failed. The hospital hooked him up to life support and told his sons that he could survive that way for weeks. His extremities swelled and turned black, as did his face. They bandaged his eyes because he could not close them. Blood dribbled from one of his ears. The hospital required a court order to turn off life support, but God intervened and ended the cruelty.
My daughter-in-law asked me to write our farewell. We loved you so much more than this. We suffer not only because we have lost you but because of the senseless way in which it happened. You must surely be in a better place, for you cannot be in a worse one. Find comfort and joy from those who preceded you and know that those you left behind will remember you as you should be remembered with love and honor.
I stayed at the hospital while you were dying, but I didn't go to your funeral. I don't think people should leave this world alone, but I just couldn't bring myself to celebrate your life when you caused so much havoc.
Why were you such an evil man? Why did you molest your children? Why did you do such horrible things? It's because of you that so many of your children are mentally and emotionally fucked up. It's because of you that I don't have the mother I should. I hate you for taking away my mother and her siblings' innocence.
I'm pretty sure you're burning in hell right now.
I tried to come to your funeral, but instead ended up at someone else's funeral by accident. It wasn't until I got to the casket that I noticed it wasn't you. Sitting through someone else's funeral when I was supposed to be saying Goodbye to you, was hard.
It's been 10 years since you died. Why did you kill yourself? Life outside of high school is so very different from the teenage hell we each go through. All you had to do was hang on, just a few more years. It's too late, though. It's because of your death and me living through and surviving teenage years that I wish I could reach out to high schoolers to tell them that it's all going to be okay.
I wish you would have reached out to someone.